A coloring page from plm

An iPod without iTunes?

I'll let you know how it works, after the bar.

Hack Attack: The self-sustaining iPod - Lifehacker

Law and Order Valentines

"Law & Order: Special Victims Unit" Valentines--Brandon Bird

And a little creepy.

my favorite MBE fact pattern

"Bill was walking along an unpaved road on his way to work. Suddenly, a school bus coming in the opposite direction began to careen toward him. This was due to the fact that the bus driver, Wally, had momentarily lost control of the bus while attempting to light a cigarette.

To avoid being hit by the bus, Bill jumped off the road into Carol's yard. Unfortunately, he landed in a bed of prize-winning zinnias and damaged them extensively."

Ah, the benefits of cigarette smoking.

Tis the season for taxes

Internal Revenue Service

And if you are going to use an online service to file your taxes, and your adjusted gross income is less than $50,000, make sure you go through the IRS's website to file for free.

You want to start at the IRS. They will take you to the professional site's free service. Even if you end up being over the amount, they will still complete your taxes (for a fee, see below). If you start at the business end, and try to go back and get the service for free, you might be out of luck. Not all of the companies will allow you to reenter through the IRS site, and then you end up reentering everything on another site. (thanks HRBlock)

The free offer is for Federal preparation and e-filing only. You're gonna pay $20-25 for state filing no matter what. Be careful, some of the sites make you pay for the state preparation whether you want them to do your state taxes or not. They will also charge you money to take their fee out of your refund, usually $25. If your AGI is over $50,000, you'll pay $25 for a basic filing (no professional assistance). Don't let them charge you for direct depositing your money into your account. This is a free service from the Feds and Oregon. You can get it done for about $44 if you play your cards right, and know what you are doing. On that note:

If you can't find information under theIRS's individals site, go to the tax professionals site. The information is well organized for those of you that are a bit tax savvy. Better yet, go to the Code, for the WORD. But be careful with that one, unless you have a handle on statutory interpretation. Google search is also a good avenue for your questions, and you will likely find articles explaining your issue in a more understandable language.

Better yet, just do those taxes on paper (or fillable PDF form) unless they are really complicated. And no, don't call me to help you, at least not until after Feb. 23rd. I have done our house's taxes though, yeay.

Oregon forms.

Lastly, don't forget the Multnomah County ITAX. You can file and pay online. Last year, this. Or better yet, don't pay. Perhaps then I can work for the County again and take you to court. I could use the job. Oh and for you 'Couvs, I'll find a way, someday, don't worry.

Timely revenge

With the neighbor being a complete and total douchebag, Web Zen has found several lovely sites dedicated to the pursuit of revenge.

Concern over 'spare part' babies

Ohhh, just like The Island. Or just an excuse for Ewan to visit.

BBC NEWS | Health | Concern over 'spare part' babies: "It warns that once a child has been created to save a sibling, there could be a temptation to view them as a spare parts bank."

Sounds like this could be our plm's potential

Oddly Enough News Article | Reuters.com: "A former female wrestler, accused of killing 11 elderly women in the Mexican capital, had an altar to the skeletal, scythe-wielding Santa Muerte, death cult figure in her home, newspapers said on Saturday."

And a proper news source, mere hours after the fact

OregonLive.com: NewsFlash - Minor quake reported in Portland

If Cascadia ever happens, I wonder what chance any of us have. Though I think we might be ok in PDX.

Update on the earthquake

Info for Eq uw01290200: "A micro earthquake occurred at 6:00:53 PM (PST) on Saturday, January 28, 2006.
The magnitude 2.8 event occurred 2 km (1 miles) SW of Portland, OR ."

My first! How very exciting!

Thanks to Technorati and the ability they have given me to search blogs for news. This is the first time that I've realized the full potential of blogs to get helpful information.

Breaking news!

I think I just felt an Earthquake, here in Portland, Oregon, at about 6:00

And darn it if I can find any news on the internet.

At first I thought perhaps the neighbors were bombing us. S got into a yelling match with them today. Yikes! I think the line of communication might get better from here. In the aftermath, I fully realized that I'm a gentrificator. More on that theory later.

calling all former bird watchers

If anyone has a bird feeder that they are no longer using, please drop it off at our house. We need as many as we can get our hands on. Also, if anyone has an easy and cheap design for a bird feeder, I'd love to hear about it. My intent is purely to start discovering the wonders of urban birds.

On a completely unrelated note, I am again watching my neighbors powerwash and shopvac their swimming pool, with the extension cord dangling dangerously close to falling into the water. I'm on the edge of my seat and just cannot focus on my Evidence MBE questions. Will it happen today? The best part is that the whole damn family is in the pool. Driving me crazy.

Hey Thug/Crap/GS/plm/StCarl, when we having that concert in my backyard? I'll supply the beer.

Btw, gotta watch The Life of Birds by David Attenborough (Blue Planet series).

And another David that also had me dropping my jaw in amazement, this time in incredulity, David Hasslehoff singing "Hooked on a feeling". You must watch this video, it is possibly the worst ever, by anyone, which is sad, because he's not that bad a singer.

end of the day rant

I just paid $125 for the ability to take the bar exam on my laptop. The difference will likely allow me to pass the exam. Typing my law school exams after writing them for two semesters increased my grades at least one full grade. This program is exactly like word. I know there were be functions such as spell-check that may not be available on the day of the exam, but having a backspace is all I really need. Incredible program.

The rant? $125! That's like paying to pass. I've already paid $700 to apply for this bar exam. OUCH! What a racket. I understand there is a lot to organize, but the software is something that if allowed, I could likely download for free.

I better find a job when all this is done, or I've really made some serious mistakes in my life choices. Ah well, at least I've had a three year break from painting.

How I spent my morning

Making a new blog.

Please note the new handy features: technorati "search this blog" box; archive pull down menu with an easy to find link to this month (January) in the header; a lovely "syndicate this site" heading in the sidebar (so you don't have to check back unless there is something new); and my profile may be reached by clicking on the picture.

I've deleted the random photo blog, cuz it was pretty silly, even I rarely used it. Three I think is enough here.

New picture is up, and no more buttons. I'm going simplistic and subtle this time. Enjoy.

I had a dream last night, and this is what I dreamt. There are a few bugs to work out, but I'm done working on it today (gotta get back to work).


Constructive criticism welcome.

Sweet, a beer robot.

Why do I love robots so? Because of their potential, and this just about takes the cake.

Gear Factor

Pet Stroller - oh my

Blue Pet Stroller | Dog Stroller | Cat Stroller

Speaking of spa treatment

Here's Sam....chillin' out. Click on the pic for his Flickr set.



Here's a past post, with newly born pic. (which makes me rant at blogger. I tried the top search button and it came up with nothing. So I went to Technorati, downloaded the search bar on the lower left of your screen. When I typed in "Sam" I was instantly taken to this former post. Poo on blogger for making me have a useless header.)

Doggie bathrobe

So, I finally washed the dog, in the bathtub, with the handsprayer attachment that was kinda the excuse for the new bathtub/shower fixture (washing the dog was the excuse).

It was a lot easier than I thought, but since we don't have an industrial hair dryer for him, besides he hates the noise, on a whim, I googled "dog bathrobe."

Check this shiz out, they have several kinds. Sooooooooo cool.

Update: in the groove

Ok, it's all falling into place, but first:

Skiing on Sunday kinda sucked. We went back to the first place that I had skied, Snow Bunny at Mt. Hood. Sadly, it was earlier in the day, and thus there were millions more people, including two couples with rabid dogs. Rabid dogs have to be put on leashes. Anyone with a dog knows that factors of dominance change greatly when one dog is put on a leash. They become much more defensive while the unleashed dog (Fife) becomes more aggressive. Fife normally will roll over for just about any dog (except dogs that are too close to mom or dad, he's a pretty damn fine dog). So, add skis into the mix and there was a lot of Three Stooges action going on. Besides all the obnoxious people, the snow was pretty sticky, and we didn't have any spray wax, so the entire uphill was tougher than usual (even worse, I tried thicker socks and tighter lacing, which I thought would fix the sloppy feeling I had the week before. It only made me have blisters). The downhill wasn't nearly as fast and exciting as it could have been. It was, however, exercise.

With my switching to Firefox, I've decided to go all open source. OpenOffice is downloading and Linux will soon follow. Even better, Steve has been learning how to run servers, thus my website might soon be up, and since I'm sure the hits won't be that many, we'll be able to run it off our own server. Sweet.

And what did I do before I discovered widgets? And I'm not talking about the legal fiction. These things are what make a computer friendly. Now, well after the bar, I'll start making my own, so that I can have the perfect computer. Between that and all this open source stuff, I'll finally be able to manipulate the computer to my exact liking. The thought gives me chills.

And, studying for the bar. Today I'm shifting into 4th gear. I have 4 weeks before the bar exam. I have a detailed plan which consists entirely of practice exams. 3 hour shifts, 3 shifts per day. Two shifts are writing essays and one is multiple choice for the multi-state. I have to do some research as to whether I'm typing the exam on my laptop or writing the exam, it all depends on the editing features of the program I have to use.

I no longer have the need to sleep. I go to bed with my civil procedure notes and fall asleep at 2:00, only to wake at 4:00, then sleep from 5-6 and lie awake until I realize I should make use of the time, out of bed at 7:00. Should be one hella interesting four weeks. No smoking, drinking, or sleeping. I am, however, eating rather well, and am making sure to only work one three hour shift on Sunday.

Other than that, I know Steve and I are looking forward to this being over and the job search getting started. Those student loan bills are HUGE! Not to mention the consumer debt, which is getting larger by the minute.

I wanted a challenge, so I went to law school. I got what I asked for and then some.

Update to the update: OpenOffice may not be happening just yet. I have made an initial attempt, and realized that I have had 3 years of heavy Word use that has created a highly tuned and finely crafted setup (and that's just law school. I did have 5 years as an undergrad don't you forget) . OpenOffice looks like chaos, and most importantly, will not easily allow my blue background that has saved my vision from degenerating below -4.25.

I'll not be using OO anytime soon, perhaps not until I hang my shingle out there for the world (don't worry, won't be anytime soon).

The treehouse photos

For those of you that do not know this story, my boyfriend, in his youth, decided the money his parents gave him for living expenses would be best spent on a trip to India.

How did he live in the meantime, you ask? He and his friends built a treehouse in the woods near his college. They also did it just because well, its funny. They were found out, but it took the authorities quite a while.

For those of you that were there, please add to the story if you'd like. I recall something about folks being kicked off campus, and other craziness, but the story changes depending on the person who is telling it. Regardless, here, finally, are the pictures, posted on the internet for all to see. I don't even know who the people are, except Stephen and Steve. If you don't like my titles, get your own Flickr account, beyotches.

Enjoy.

P.S. the Barn (?) in NE PDX has a wonderful band that plays on Friday and Saturday night. Just make sure and get that bluing rinse in before you go. I felt like I was back in WI for the night. You certainly missed a good time, Omega.

Boing Boing: Big theater chains refuse to show Soderbergh's "Bubble"

Everyone should go and see this on opening day. The concept is a worthy way to deal with pirating (rather than be assholes), and I like the concept of being able to see a movie on DVD the same day it opens in the theater. For now, to prove it will work, we have to go to the cinema.

Besides, it looks like it will be a pretty messed up movie, and I know how some of you think baby doll's heads are funny.

Boing Boing: Big theater chains refuse to show Soderbergh's "Bubble"

A close up of a sea monkey

A close up of a sea monkey
Originally uploaded by jkf.

I miss my Sea Monkeys.

But Meg sent me the history of the world, and who knew it was all created by chimps. Humans invented rocks though.

Liked Grizzly Man?

I ended up liking the movie against my will. But here is a wonderful parody that just made me laugh and laugh.

Grizzly Bear Man

Savage Love - January 18, 2006

This is for StCarl, who came up with the idea of a video game for Brokeback Mountain, and I wouldn't buy his pitch. I hope this makes him feel vindicated:

Savage Love - January 18, 2006 | The A.V. Club: "I can't believe that you've had nothing to say about Brokeback Mountain. Every other writer in America—gay and straight!—has an opinion, but not you? What's the deal?
That Movie Is So Gay

The deal, TMISG, is that I haven't seen Brokeback Mountain yet. (But I have played the video game—and, wow, it's so lifelike you can almost taste Heath Ledger's spit!) Ang Lee's film is a Cinematic Holy Day of Obligation for homos everywhere, but I got a special dispensation from a gay priest. I said a couple of 'Oh, Marys,' and now I have until March to see it."

Savory Spam Crescents

Wow! Here's a recipe! With gmail, there is an RSS feed at the top, plugging whatever you happen to have a message about. When the Spam folder is opened, there are always recipes using, you guessed it, Spam. Here's my favorite to date, how can you go wrong with bacon AND Spam?

hahaha I found another dutch angle

It's huge here, we're so close
Originally uploaded by jkf.

This is Mt. Adams. I believe we are ascending. What a hike! I would do again, preferably backpacking to the top to see a pretty amazing 360 view.

Top News Article | Reuters.com

Court rules govt. can't stop Oregon suicide law:

"In a stinging defeat for the administration, the high court ruled by a 6-3 vote that then-Attorney General John Ashcroft wrongly interpreted a federal law in 2001 to bar distribution of controlled drugs to assist suicides, disregarding the Oregon law authorizing it."

Google Transit

Google is using Portland to test their new service. Simply type in your start and end destination and any time issues and get a lovely map and times and other delightful information (try doing it in satellite mode to see major landmarks). If you don't specify by when you want to get there, it will just load the next few departures.

Better maps than Trimet, and a bit easier interface. The only thing I would suggest is making the timetables available. But they do offer several options to make it rather flexible. Highly recommended for one who uses public transportation not so often, or to go places one hasn't been on the bus/MAX.

Google Transit - 630 NE Killingsworth St., portland oregon to 2130 North Kilpatrick Street, Portland, OR by 5:00pm

DIY passport photos - Lifehacker

DIY passport photos - Lifehacker

optical illusion

optical illusion
Originally uploaded by jkf.

Fav. photo of the day. I watched Constant Gardner this weekend (good movie) and laughed at some moments just because they tried so hard to be artsy (dutch angles, and such). I recalled my early photo days, and I would always take photos on an angle, leaving for irritated viewers. Here, the angle serves well. It looks as though the water is close, but you'll see in the next photo, that he's actually rather high up, at the top of the waterfall below. And no one is laughing.

The Waterfall
Originally uploaded by jkf.

a good weekend

"Did you get any odd phone calls?"

"What, from you?"

"No, anything weird, from anyone weird?"

"You mean from Jared? Was that you? I was SO pissed that he kept calling, twice a day, and I always had to call back and ask to have it cancelled."

It was funnier in person, I was on the floor and peeing my pants. If you missed the Jared prank phone call idea, look here. I don't really feel too bad about it, it was highly amusing.

And then I made myself ill again, by mixing liquor and ibuprofen. My stomach bleeding all day Saturday, I finally went to the store and discovered the miracle that is Pepto-Bismol. After a day of agony, the soothing pink liquid (plus some lemon-ginger Tazo tea to wash it down), made me feel like a new woman.

Well enough in fact to go cross-country skiing on Sunday. What a hell of a lot of fun! I have a much better hang of things this time, having learned about the edges of the skis and how to use them for better traction. I'm also able to look up when going downhill, rather than look at my skis, which keeps me from falling quite as much.

We had a rather strenuous hike up into Mt Hood, and then quite a long and challenging downhill out. Several parts of which I was going so fast that I scared myself. I do need to learn how to do that sliding sideways stop that they do on TV, and become more fluid going back and forth (instead of my current method of tucking and pointing my skis straight downhill, for max. speed). On one especially steep hill, I used the plow technique to go slow, but hit a bump and did an amazing fall just like on TV, legs and skis and me and snow all in one flying debris pile. All is well. In fact, Steve had the only injury of the day, his wrist got a bit banged up.

I will definitely go again as soon as possible. An amazing rush. I felt like Roger Moore.

Fallen, and really, I can't get up, at least not until the photo is taken

Fallen, and really, I can't get up
Originally uploaded by jkf.

My favorite photo for today. Fife is stuck up to his knees in mud. I had fallen, and could not get up, because of the angle. My knee was pretty much shot (thus the dual hiking sticks), and this was the most difficult of the hikes we'd done. Everyone we had talked to said not to go to Cape Scott. Many native Vancouver islanders had not been there. We weren't gonna go. Images of vertical rain in our heads, we slowly made our way north, went to Cape Scott and conquered. It was the most beautiful view of the trip, 360 degrees baby, sunny and mostly clear. Fantastic. It was the most difficult hike on the island, and the most rewarding. Fuck not passing the bar, I hiked St. Patricks.


Here's what the tourist info says about it:

"Visitors to Cape Scott should be well prepared for adverse weather conditions - all year round. Annual rainfall is between 375 and 500 centimetres, and prolonged sunny periods are a rarity, even in summer. High winds, rain and generally stormy conditions can be expected at any time of the year. There is no best time to visit the park, although mid summer is generally preferred. A storm once blew so hard that it turned the lighthouse here sideways!"

Creepy Lord of the Rings trees

Creepy Lord of the Rings trees
Originally uploaded by jkf.

This struck me as rather odd. Two stark white trees, in the middle of one of the longest and most strenuous hikes of all time. It had it all: the base was at a mining operation that one could hear most of the hike; wasp's nests that attacked puppa and I; about 100 switchbacks with unceasingly boring scenery; and beautiful Arnica lake in a meadow at the top, with pretty flowers. We sang our way down the mountain, making up a song that contained the number of the switchback we were on. I'm glad there was no one else around.

Lost days

I have lost two days of studying. I was starting to really get on a roll, and then started throwing up. Then I got a migraine from having not eaten in so long. Normally, I just take my meds and the migraine goes away. Alas, I haven't any meds, nor any money to buy them without insurance. Thus, I took as many ibuprofen and aleve that I thought safe and had about 10 minutes where my head only felt a dull pain. For the rest of the night, I had to put a cold cloth over my eye just to tolerate it. Did I mention that migraines also make me throw up? Yep, so first the flu, then migraine. Perhaps someone wants me to lose weight? Yowzers.

However, I'm much better today, and gonna try and find some food to stave off any more migraines. And now I have to get some bloody work done. So much for going out tonight or skiing on Sunday. Looks like I'm stuck here.

And I should mention that you should never go to the Kenton post office. Besides the legions of old people that were there, making the process the slowest possible, they have a teller that loudly proclaimed that she never stays home when she is sick. Rather, she goes to work, and stays home when she is well, so that she can enjoy it. Lovely. Thanks for the flu, bitch.

forgot to upload the skiing photos

These are some photos from my first time skiing properly. Lying in bed yesterday and today has allowed me to remember to upload these. I'm lying in bed because I have the flu. Lovely, the chills, aches, puking and other lovelies. I'm most thankful that it's James Bond 24/007 week. Yeay. If I didn't feel like I'm dying of hunger and dehydration and caffeine withdrawl, I might just be able to enjoy it.

I would like to mention that my baby has taken wonderful care of me. 7up with a straw!

Back to sleep.

Musings

Today, I’ve decided to vent my inability to focus by typing the nonsense that goes through my head onto the bottom of the outline that I am currently working on. The product lies before you (hyperlinks to be added later – btw, it is impossible to pantomime “hyperlinks” in a game of Cranium. Try it.):

Every day I try really hard to focus on learning a significant portion of a predetermined subject. I have discovered I only have the ability to do about ¼ of what I need to do. Why? I have no attention span. My ability to focus lasts about 15 minutes, and then, though I try to consciously battle it, I will find myself engaged in some other activity. And not because there are so many distractions. If I were in a completely white, circular room with only a table and my study materials, all I need for distraction is my own head. I can look at a page of administrative law and immediately lose eye focus. Now, I’m the type that reads every word that I see. I cannot help it. But put some admin. in front of my face and I’m stuck in my head, with blurry eyes, thinking about how dreamy Russ Feingold is (I got to listen to him grill Allito on the way to the post office today – now I don’t have to study absolute immunity, thanks Russ!).

Solution? I don’t know. I have no insurance, so no way to get evaluated and medicated. So, in an attempt to self-diagnose, I’m taking something called “Extreme Energy. ” It has vitamins (mostly Bs) in addition to the 100mgs of caffeine per pill. I thought it might work a bit better than NoDoz’s pure caffeine pills. And coffee or soda, yeah, that just makes me pee more, which makes me leave the work station more. Speaking of leaving the work station, I thought that the reason I never got anything done was the million cigarette breaks I used to take. Nope. Well, so far, there is no extreme energy, but at least I’m not falling asleep nearly as often. Should be an interesting month and a half.

Good news: First: I went running last night. I had looked at my Costa Rica pictures, and realized that a year and a half ago, I had very little fat on my body. Thus, no more excuses, I have to lose 20 pounds, or maybe 15.

Second: I sold almost all of my remainder text books, to add about $400 to my pocket. WHEW! Money’s makin me ill, but some good news makes me feel better and now there are fewer books to deal with. I'm a wiz at ebay selling these days.

Third: the best podcast is the Ricky Gervais show. Get it through iTunes, it is free and funny as hell.

Anyone with any other hints on good podcasts, let me know. Ok, back to my 15 minutes on. My new motivation tool will be running my stopwatch next to me. Whenever I work, I get to let it run. When I stop, to say, type this, I have to turn it off. That way, I see how much I actually accomplish. Beta phase. I may reverse the process, I’ll see which make me more scared about the wasted time.

Oh, and lawnmower man (he mows local lawns and tried to attack Steve once) has again gone off of his meds. He’s been knocking on our door incessantly while we run and hide upstairs with the gun to wait until he breaks in. Evidently he messed with the wife of the very large man across the street (knocking also on her door, she mistakenly opened it. I’m so glad I put in the peep hole). He went to the crazy man’s house and told him to stop knocking on people’s doors and that he has a gun. Sweet. Perhaps he’ll harass some other neighborhood. Steve wants to get him some help, but I just would rather stay outta this guy’s way entirely. Perhaps if he was nice when on the meds, but he’s still pretty creepy.

Tomorrow I have to go back to the fraggin dentist. I love him, but I really don’t think this visit is necessary. I called him last weekend because I was in so much pain that I was crying. The intense pain has subsided, but there is a constant and annoying dull pain as well as sharp pain whenever I eat. I’ve only one spot in my mouth that can be used to chew. But that’s normal after having three fillings, isn’t it? Poop, there’s more money down the drain. He better at least give me some pain meds, but I wanna play it down a bit considering I don’t want a root canal. OH lord, please no root canal.

get phone calls from Jared, yeah, the Subway guy

I'm not one for practical jokes, because I really don't like them played on me. But if you know anyone that won't be pissed off (I would), please sign them up and let me know about it.

Jared's January Fresh Reminders Calls

Baby, I love you and am sorry, and I did it before I thought about it. It was just too good to pass up. Please save one so that I can hear it. Oh, and if you win a drawing, you might get an actual call from him. teehee

Besides, I wanna see your ribs again.

I need a favor folks

a floppy disk - 2½ x 3¾. An external one is what I'll need, because my secondary drive isn't swappable.

See, the Oregon Bar administrators are finally allowing the use of a laptop on the bar exam. And since I wrote my exams the first year of law school and then saw my grades go up by a full letter when I decided to start typing them, I do believe I've got a shot this time, no matter the subjects they throw at me.

So, if anyone can help me out, please let me know as soon as possible. The exam isn't until Feb 20ish, (OMFG!) but I'd rather make sure I have one and it works and I know how to make it work. Otherwise I'll just buy one.

my favorite photo for today

Wowzers, were we tired!

Netflix Jacked By USPS - Gizmodo

I knew it!!!!!!!!!
Netflix Jacked By USPS - Gizmodo

Install Windows unattended - Lifehacker

Ever have to do a clean-install? Or do you rebuild your computer, even half as often as you should? Then take a look at this article. The actual site I wasn't able to get to at the moment, but Lifehacker will get you there. The idea is that you don't have to spend so much time fiddling around with all the little things, just to get your computer working efficiently again.

"Have you ever wanted a Windows CD that would install Windows by automatically putting in your name, product key, timezone and regional settings? And have it merged with the latest Service Pack to save time? Followed by silently installing all your favourite applications along with DirectX 9.0c, .Net Framework 1.1 and then all the required hotfixes, updated drivers, registry tweaks, and a readily patched UXTheme.dll without any user interaction whatsoever? Then this guide will show you how you can do just that!"

The ending of this one makes it my new favorite

I'm pretty sure Jesus would write this:

hate-mail: "Post this B*TCH Hey you ateist son of a b***h, you are a big A*****E! If this is a joke, you are so GAY. You know that you have pissed the hell out of a christian when I start cussing. You are so full of sh*t; how can you believe all this crap. Pardon my french, but you are such a big jacka$$ for believing this bullsh*t.Come on, dumb***, do you seriously think that a pile of s**t, sorry, spagetti would fly around and create a mountain, trees, and a midget??!! God created you and all of your 'followers' and he can take you out just like that. You sound alot like what happened to satan. You and all of your followers are the ones that will go to hell. Just remember, WWJD
Michael Hearn"

Hate mail to the Flying Spaghetti Monster

This stuff makes me laugh so hard. I cannot believe that these are "christians." They talk so much about going to hell and having ass sex. What is that all about? Scroll down to the bottom for the newest stuff hate-mail. One of my favorites:

: "I just saw your fucking website and you have to be the most screwed up mother fucker out there. Do you realize that people eat your fucking FSM everyday. This is the most stupid bullshit I have ever heard in my fucking life. I feel sorry for your parents because they have raised such a dumbass and if I were them I would never show my face again. If i ever meet up with you or one of your 'followers' I will beat the living fucking hell out of them. You are so fucking stupid I don't know how you made it to college much less out of preschool. One of theses days you are going to mess with the wrong person and theyare going to slap the fuck out of you. Your pictures are stupid and the flying spaghetti monster is the ugliest fucking thing I have ever seen. I bet your just as fucking ugly as that damn thing is. That sort of monster would scare the hell out of any little kid in your preschool classes. Get a life you dumbass fucking idiot and then maybe you will see how stupid you really sound to the people that are not believeing in all this shit that you come up with. All your trying to do is get attention and obviously it's working but in the opposite way you fuckhead. You probably never get laid because of your stupid ass suggestions. Hope you have the most fucked up life with your FSM beliving dumbass girlfriend that you getone day. MAYBE!! When that girl comes along and belives this shitn then she will be just as stupoid as your ass. Have a good day and hope that you have really fucked up kids. God Bless!
- sherlet davis"

NYC inspires some crazy shit

This is almost as good as the I heart NYC snowglobe with at plastic garbage bage in it. A site that sells a cube of NYC garbage for $50.

another great web zen

This one is about found objects, some of the photos are fantastic. web zen. For some fun time killin flash games see last week's zen.

FAREWELL, BLACK TABLE.

Suck ass. This is one of my favorite websites. I haven't sent them money or anything, so I guess it is partially my fault they are leaving the internets. Suck. I'm seriously irritated. But if you need a good read, catch up on some of the back issues. Good stuff. FAREWELL, BLACK TABLE.

IRS to Tax Your World of Warcraft Booty? :: Street Tech :: hardware beyond the hype

This is why I should, or perhaps should not, be an IRS person. IRS to Tax Your World of Warcraft Booty? :: Street Tech :: hardware beyond the hype

New Year's Eve PARTAAAAY

I forgot to mention the most important social event of my last few months: the New Year's Eve Party.

I mistakenly thought it was gonna be a bit dull. I had just taken a nap, was a bit hungry and drowsy. That was all taken care of with a shot of Herradura and a glass of Johnny Walker. Then, the fun started.

I received two gifts: a magic 8 type ball on a keychain, but it is the devil's ball. Funny in too many ways. The other gift was a dollar store rendition of the old table football game. You know, the one where you fold a piece of paper like a flag and the other person holds up their hands like goalposts? It's fantastic. However, I left it there, because I had somehow lost the professional version of the football (it was larger than the collegiate version), and thought the only way I would ever get that back would be to leave the whole thing there, so that it at least made it into the packaging.

A present that S got was a horrible game that pits up to four players against each other to press the button when a light turns green. The last one to press their button (jeopardy style) would receive a mild or extreme shock. I did this WAY too many times.

And we drank and I was very flitty, the way I like to be at parties, the personification of stream of consciousness. I even had written in indellible ink on places of my body that shouldn't have been allowed to have been photographed. Ah well, it was all for fun.

Anyway, props to Crapartist for throwing a whopper of a party. It was indeed a fantastic way to ring in the New Year.

One more thing

Some of you are loyal to my site and have still been checking every day. I love you.

And I wanted to mention that I have recently converted to Firefox as my internet browser. I've been curious and tried it before, but was stubborn. It blows netscape and explorer out of the water for being able to be manipulated in the manner that I wish. I am in love.

Howdy

I'm lame, I know it. I haven't spent any time communicating to my long lost friends, not even in this sort of lame, third-person format. I just haven't had the heart to burden any more people with the soul torture that I've been putting myself through in the last few months.

See, I wasn't sure if I should take the bar again. What I really want to do is get a job, any job and work and get a paycheck and have money and be happy. But that is not my fate. I found a way to pay the application fee for the bar exam, and $700 later, I'm locked in. I have enough money to pay minimum bills until April. After that, I must have a job. Thus, I must pass the bar this time or I'll have to move to a country where I cannot be found. And that sounds uncomfortable, besides, where will I blend in? Ireland, Germany, Australia? Likely places where the law will catch up with me. SUCK.

Anyway, I've been talking to you, old blog, a lot, but not writing anything down, because I was happy with my thoughts being my own and not being read by anyone and everyone. Proud of me though, blog? I didn't destroy you this time. I'm learning.

So, I have wanted to say that Star Wars III is the worst movie I've seen in a long time. When everything, even the bodies of humans are CGI, you've gone too far. And how about hiring a writer next time? I feel bad about wasting my time.

On the other hand, King Kong was one of the best action/adventure movies I've seen in forever. I don't know how people can not like it. It was amazing. Long, but so what. Genius it was. Perfect for what it was supposed to be: entertaining and exciting. I've learned throught the review of these two movies, the people that I will never listen to for movie viewing advice.

Oh, and "The Long Way Round," the videotaping of Ewan MacGregor and his friend Charley something (son of a famous director) as they ride their motorcycles around the world is wonderful as well.

I'm off to study for now, I must keep plugging away at this material, and hope that more sinks in this time than the last.

Thanks for listening.

This some funny shit

Boys' Private Parts: 10 Things Every Girl Should Know About Them - IRON HYMEN - Girls Abstinence-Only Education Coolness Program: "The stuff that comes out of boys every time they use you has as many calories as seven whole pints of Häagen-Dazs. That's why all the girls who do 'it' always get so fat and ugly and have that ulcerated skin that screams to everyone in church, 'I am an insatiable slut!'"

Also see "10 THINGS ALL THE COOL DUDES ARE DOING INSTEAD OF BEING LAME AND QUEER AND HAVING SEX!"